Default Settings

Drawings of the brain and skull by Leonardo da Vinci.

Understanding defaults is important. Anyone who works with technology knows that the computer’s default setting is zero, where all things are flat and neutral. But when it comes to life and understanding ourselves, we tend to forget about our own natural default setting which is, unfortunately, not neutral. Here’s the terrible truth: the default setting of our mind is selfishness, pure and utter self-centeredness. This is not hard to test; pick anything — money, wife/husband, house, child, career and it becomes YOUR money, YOUR wife/husband, YOUR house, YOUR child, YOUR career. Since the brain’s job and nature is to think, it will always default to thinking about the “me” and the “mine.” It’s also particularly obsessed with time and the urge to satisfy emotional needs; it doesn’t like to incorporate things like deep-time thinking. Security-oriented thinking might be suitable in the biological habitat of a jungle or open ocean but when it comes to human happiness it becomes problematic.

“Occupation with one’s self brings about shrinkage in the brain.” — J. Krishnamurti, Philosopher

Anyone who has spent enough time to learn about himself knows that when he is mostly concerned about his own being it becomes near impossible to experience and understand the truly great things in life such as love, creativity and truth. We could expand the list to include the virtues of genuineness, sincerity, generosity, compassion, and humility. All these elements, which are both immeasurable and unmeasurable, fall outside of the confines of the egoic mind.

Now, thinking itself isn’t always or necessarily bad, for it is tremendously useful for the practical acquisition of knowledge and necessary skills for basic everyday living. All of science or any mechanical activity in fact depend heavily on logical observation, dissection as well as specialization. The categorization of things and theories give rise to technological innovation which lead to greater comfort and convenience. Even learning to be a good artist requires a significant amount of time devoted to deep analytical study, accumulation of technique and sustained practice. These all belong under the realm of intellectual activity. Unfortunately, while the intellectual and calculating mind succeeds in the physical world, it fails in the psychological world. As cliché as it sounds, the truth is that the mind is an excellent servant but a terrible master.

“Knowledge is useful until it gets in the way.” — David Bohm, Physicist 

I’ve always been a big fan of science, and I still spend some time reading up on the latest neuro-scientific discoveries or matters of quantum or theoretical physics. After all, I might have continued my studies in science at university had I felt more capable at math, for math is the language of science. But as great as science is, it’s limited because our ability to see and know the universe is and always will be limited. That’s because science deals only with the measurable — that is its fundamental condition and paradigm — yet there is so much more to this universe than that which can be measured. Art proves to be a good example. In fact, I would contend that science helps us to see, record and understand the truths of the world while art helps us to experience and ultimately realize it. For without realization, most understanding is merely intellectual understanding, and not true comprehension. A man can study and analyze swimming all he likes but until he actually swims in the water he really doesn’t know what swimming is like at all.

The practice of art has always served to bridge that gap between the truths that can be known and those that can only be felt. Hence, creativity is such a novel thing; the very act of creation implies dealing with the unknown and discovering the new. This is why creativity is a not an act of repetition or copying, and it’s most certainly not stealing or exploitation. The creative act, like love and all other unmeasurable experiences, is a fresh activity, one always grounded in the present, alive in the now. It cannot rely on past knowledge, memory, or formulas even if it may use them when needed as springboards for inspiration and exploration. To create implies taking a risk which can never be accurately pre-calculated.

Gertrude Stein, by Pablo Picasso is one of my favorite portraits in all of art. It’s creative adventure lay the groundwork for cubism and abstract art.

“If you knew it all it would not be creation but dictation.” — Gertrude Stein, Writer

Hence the danger of the default setting of our brains. It wants to think about the self, about its memories of the past and its need for security against the future, which is the unknown. It hates risk. The mind wants to think and to think about protecting, advancing and expanding the self. That’s its nature. To use a knives as an analogy, the nature of a knife is to cut. Knives are very useful for cutting but they’re impractical for other tasks. Furthermore, when they aren’t sharp or are handled carelessly or without skill they are dangerous and even deadly. Likewise, when thinking is used outside its parameters, it gets in the way. This is very evident with athletes, musicians or stage actors who have too much on their mind during a live performance. And since the default state of our brains is to think, it’s hard to stop it from doing so. As almost all our activities, both verbal and physical, spring from our thoughts it’s all too easy to suffer psychological conflict. Hence, when we bad thoughts, we easily behave poorly; the selfish mind almost always triggering a reactive (and often negative/violent) response.

“The soul is dyed with the colour of its thoughts.” — Marcus Aurelius, Roman Emperor

And then, there’s another dilemma: just as our brains don’t like dealing with unknowns (even when danger isn’t necessarily apparent) it also knows and feels that deep inside — deeper than what the mind can logically comprehend — is a voice that says we have to explore new truths. We want to learn, discover and experience what we’ve haven’t before. Even as a lot of new things such as new films/books/products are trite, distasteful or poor, we still hold out hope that the next one might be good. The unknown is exciting just as it is scary. Creation is fun. Unfortunately, we cannot “will” ourselves to be creative, nor can we acquire it, nor cultivate it. And to think we can do so is as futile as trying to do the same with love. It’s no wonder that we say we “discover” creative ideas and “fall” in love. These wonderments can only happen when the mind is empty, free from self-consciousness. The best we can do is set up conditions that might allow for them to happen. In art, we do this by raising our skills, while at the same time opening up our hearts and minds to the unfathomable, and to living humbly with courage and conviction.

But perhaps the real solution lies in strengthening our attention, which is not the same thing as concentration, for attentiveness is an inclusive act exercising the highest levels of sensitivity whereas concentration is an act of isolation and exclusion. In other words, concentration is a mechanical process that separates and closes off reality in order to narrow its focus while attention is aligning oneself with one’s target while being mindful of the complete reality. It’s why forcing ourselves (or others) to “concentrate” is an act of abject and inevitable failure, much akin for forcing oneself to sleep when one is not sleepy. Suppression is not focus. Externalized discipline is not order. True attention is the kind of focus that sees all while not being distracted by anything in the field of vision. In the writings of the great 17th century Samurai warrior Miyamoto Musashi, he talked of focusing on one’s opponent in the battlefield while being fully aware of the entire battleground. The artist, or any human who hopes to live with honor, clarity and purpose aims for such level of awareness in all that he does and is.

“The heart of a wise man is tranquil.” — Chuang-tse, Philosopher

In summary, all that can be said is what’s already known; life isn’t easy. Nor is finding love, creation or truth. And sometimes the worst thing — that which is in the way of us discovering love, creativity or truth — is ourselves; that busy little brain of ours that tells us that we are the center of the universe. Therefore, it would be wise to be mindful of what our minds are doing, to know its nature and our own individual nature. Self knowledge is the most important knowledge and over-thinking can deter us. We must be aware of the brain’s default condition, which is often non-stop self-consciousness and self-obsession. The moment that awareness happens, the light comes in and healing begins, and we can begin to see thru the filter which is our conditioning. We need to separate thinking from doing, so that there’s clarity in both. If there’s no clarity, there can be neither love nor creativity. These things, like all great and beautiful things exist only when the concern for the self is absent. When the default state is not.

Note: If you’ve not already heard this famous 2005 commencement address at Kenyon College by the late David Foster Wallace, a writer of immense talent, intelligence and compassion, I advise that you watch this colorful video below. It summarizes what is said here with a balance of humor and seriousness. And although Wallace may have lost his battle with the mind, it does not take away the meaning, power and truth of his words.

Video illustration by After School of David Foster Wallace’s magnanimous essay “This is Water.”

Look, Listen, Learn

Self-portrait by Lucien Freud. Deep attentiveness was a predominant trait of this master realist.

A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. ― David Bohm, Physicist

Why are so many people stuck within their own ideologies? Whether it’s an issue related to their craft or beliefs about politics, economics or religion, it seems that humans just can’t seem to keep an open mind. And despite the fact that society has made fantastical advances in science and technology, human psychology seems to want to remain living in the past — a past ridden with repeated prejudice, hate and violence. Somewhere in our history, mankind has made a wrong turn and it still hasn’t been able to develop or act on the kind of insight that would move us away from what seems like constant conflict.

“Kill the Wabbit! Kill the Wabbit!” — Chuck Jones’s comical masterpiece What’s Opera Doc deliciously captures the plight of human existence.

As artists, we’ve been privileged to partial insight due to a heightened sensitivity to the deeper rhythms of the universe. But we don’t possess total insight for we remain vulnerable to the pangs of our ego, which endlessly tries to lead us astray; greed, fear and vanity plague the artist as much as the next person. That said, creative people can see with a higher level of precision the immense beauty of the world and can help others to discover it. But they can also more readily see the darker side — the irrational ugliness that is the result of our selfish behaviour. Perhaps this explains why artists can seem so positively inspiring but also so depressed, appear immeasurably grand and generous one moment while at other times come across as narcissistic or self-indulgent. This gift and plight of the artist has been duly noted by the greatest of thinkers from Aristotle to Krishnamurti. While in tradional eastern cultures artists were seen to possess both knowledge and wisdom, western thinkers such as psychologist Carl Jung were often confused by and critical of artists, citing them as neurotic or even demonic, the gift of insight accompanied by the curse of mental suffering.

Saraswati, the Hindu goddess of the arts, knowledge and wisdom.

So what is the creative person to do? To maintain a modicum of sanity, I suspect the artist must find balance in his life; he must continue his development of this fine sensibility while reducing the level of selfishness. It’s a tricky proposition. The artist needs to express himself (the word expression coming from the root word meaning to press out or press on) because if he doesn’t he will not only feel unfulfilled, but be haunted by his daemon*. At the same time he must be careful not to be overwhelmed with what he sees and experiences. Should success or failure reveal itself, he can not and must not personalize it too much, for therein lies the danger; excessive thinking and personal attachment clouds the mind and burdens the heart.

* today the word “daemon” has been culturally distorted to mean demon or devil, as in “the devil made me do it.” In Greek origin, it was meant to relate to the bestowed actions of the supernatural or divine intervention.

Famed illustrator Normal Rockwell was always busy creating and did so late into old age. I believe that to him work and play were synonymous with each other.

I slept and dreamt that life was joy.

I awoke and saw that life was duty.

I worked and behold, duty was joy. 

— Rabindranath Tagore, Poet

For myself as an artist, I can only say I keep things as simple as possible. Big lists and fantastical ambitions might sound inspirational and in alignment with the so-called “American Dream” but it’s too easy to get lost in all that and forget about the process, which is what really matters most. Therefore, I spend most of my attention on being attentive, and to do so on the few things that I find matter. In essence, I work daily to keep my mind empty and clear, my body strong and flexible, and expend the rest of my energy towards creating. To some, that might sound like work or duty, and depending on how one defines those words, I guess it is. To me, that’s living and life worth living — a lifetime devoted to looking, listening and learning thru doing. But we can only do so effectively by possessing a mind that looks free of prejudice, eyes that listen in deep awareness, and a humble intellect that triggers the courage to take action. Anything else that comes as a by-product of such living — increased knowledge, enhanced skills/ability, wealth or social respect — are ultimately insubstantial and irrelevant. After all, virtue is its own reward.

As a difficult year approaches its end, I’d like to extend my blessings to all my readers a future occupied with looking, listening and learning and to love every moment of living in such manner.

… the ability to learn in this way is a principle common to the whole of humanity. Thus it is well known that a child learns to walk, to talk, and to know his way around the world just by trying something out and seeing what happens, then modifying what he does (or thinks) in accordance with what has actually happened. In this way, he spends his first few years in a wonderfully creative way, discovering all sorts of things that are new to him, and this leads people to look back on childhood as a kind of lost paradise. As the child grows older, however, learning takes on a narrower meaning. In school, he learns by repetition to accumulate knowledge, so as to please the teacher and pass examinations. At work, he learns in a similar way, so as to make a living, or for some other utilitarian purpose, and not mainly for the love of the action of learning itself. So his ability to see something new and original gradually dies away. And without it there is evidently no ground from which anything can grow. ― David Bohm