Category: Discussions/Essays

“AAA” Living

The Rat Wheel is often used as a symbol of the very absurd yet all too common phenomena of the “Rat Race.” But in reality, human beings are the only species on this planet to do this to themselves and to other species.

What does it mean to live a meaningful life?

This is the loaded question many of us try to avoid. Unfortunately, if we don’t think about it we’ll just keep going on repeating the same — like the rat in the wheel — chasing the inessentials until it’s too late to realize (or never realize) the futility of most of our everyday actions. One thing we do know is that having the autonomy to dictate one’s own path is critical to genuine happiness. Another thing we know is that to try live along such a path without guidance is akin to trying to draw a long straight line without a ruler. Rules, like the physical ruler, can provide a dependable hard-edge to keep us steady. The “10 Rules of Creative Living” I posted a few years ago was made in that spirit, not as a set of laws or principles, but rather as a layer of guidelines to refer to when we veer off course. Nonetheless, I was always uncomfortable about making such a long list. Although I still stand by them as strong characteristics of creative living, today I would like to refine them into something much simpler and more apt for our times. I call it AAA — Awareness, Authenticity and Agency — an acronym to serve both as a guide and symbol for quality living.

“Awareness is like the sun. When it shines on things, they are transformed.” — Thich Nhat Hanh

Awareness

To be aware is to stay alive. Whether you’re in the middle of an intersection or in the middle of a fist fight, it’s pretty helpful to realize the predicament that you’re in. It’s not wise to be or to remain oblivious to your environment, either externally or internally. Although it may be obvious that the lack of awareness in a dangerous situation can be life destroying, it’s often not so apparent how lacking internal awareness can also be harmful. We now live in highly distracting surroundings; the combination of record city populations, advanced technologies and busy market economies deny us the opportunity to actually look and see what’s going on. We’re often just caught running — busy doing or busy escaping. Either way, we’re lost and lacking mindfulness of the moment. So awareness really refers to the quality of attention to environments both within and without. It comes back to seeing. We don’t see and hear because we don’t bother to look or listen. It’s near impossible to live authentically or truthfully if we’re not even aware of the fact that we might not be. This is why it’s important to ask serious questions and not just searching for answers to petty concerns. We must not confuse the inessential for the essential; answers are useless if the wrong questions are asked. Clarity is critical. When we listen, we can learn. When we don’t, we can’t. This applies to both our art and to our lives.

“What holds attention determines action.” — William James

We must be wary of a pre-occupied mind because to occupy means to take over, so a pre-occupied mind is one that’s been taken over by a foreign agency, be it our thoughts or the thoughts (ideas) of others. Hence, to be aware means to be on the ready, always watching what is out there and what may enter here, inside our brains. In that sense, awareness implies the necessity to be alert, to have available the energy both to identify our problems and the will to respond to them (which we’ll discuss below). It also means to know our limitations and to catch ourselves off guard like when we fall for the fallacy of efficiency; being aware can trigger us to wake up and reset. And because life is unpredictable, we must be wary that it could be cut short at any moment. We must remind ourselves continually that it’s the process of living that counts, and, like music, getting to the end of it is not the point of the thing. Awareness, and the quality of attention it demands as necessary, enables living presently, timely and timelessly.

“Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.” — Mark Twain

Authenticity

Since the beginning of civilization, humankind has struggled to live authentically. Culture, which is both the knowledge and soil from which civilization is formed, acts as the background for our existence. From the time we’re born to the day we die, we’re bombarded by influences from the outside world. In today’s modern society, each one of us, by the time we’ve entered grade school, has already been heavily conditioned as to how to think and behave — the byproduct of an often discombobulated culture created by the mixture of family, schooling, the workplace, corporations, government, the media and technology. Every practicing artist knows exactly the challenges and deterrants to becoming a creative professional because it is anything but a condoned career choice or lifestyle. But even to overcome the many obstacles of resistance doesn’t necessarily mean that we’re living in a way that honors our truth each and everyday. Living authentically (and happily) ultimately means not compromising either our most fundamental principles or the deepest desires of our heart. And for the artist, this means a life devoted to his craft.

But in today’s hectic times, living an examined, meaningful life is more challenging than ever. One solace we can take is to know that living any other way is to guarantee a life of conflict and misery. Psychological and, ultimately, physiological Illness is often the result of a suppressed or repressed life. When we don’t honor our true selves, the body says no. Highly renown scientists and medical professionals — such as Dr. Robert Sapolsky (Why Zerbras don’t get ulcers) and Dr. Gabor Maté (The Myth of Normal) — have materially documentated that reality. Personally, I can also claim that to be true. I also know that almost every mistake I’ve ever made, both major and minor, have come from decisions that sided with the “rationale” of my mechanical mind rather than with my authentic self. Note that we’re not talking about choosing emotions over thought here — for emotions are still part of the mental body that reacts off the thoughts that we have — but rather listening to the gut feeling that lies deep within our being. I think there is great truth to the saying that if you don’t follow your deepest instincts life just won’t work right. I suspect that this is the reason why the logical mind is never capable of predetermining the flow or timing of things, even as we know that in life timing is almost everything. Only a mind-body that’s aligned symbiotically with the greater universe stands a chance of living with flow or perfect timing and only a mind-body that’s living authentically can be aligned with such said universe.

“Freedom is the only worthy goal in life. It is won by disregarding things that lie beyond our control.”― Epictetus

Agency

Agency can be viewed as the capacity for taking charge. We can understand the need for awareness and authenticity but if we don’t act or have the capacity to act, none of it will work. Agency is the glue that binds it all together. When we’re little children, we don’t have agency; our lives are guided and controlled by our parents and teachers. It’s not always done right, but this is normal and appropriate given we were dependents. However, once we’ve moved beyond our youth, we owe it to ourselves (and the universe) to take charge and assume stewardship over our mind and body. It’s here that freedom begins.

When we gain clarity — that is, when we know what we need to do — we must then go do it. We may not have control over many outside circumstances, but we always have agency over our attitudes and actions; the words we use, the passion we have, the preparation, hard work and expression is all ours, and we own them completely. They are all within our grasp and responsibility. And because we welcome to the world what we project, we must know that the way we do things is how we’ll experience them. This is a powerful truth, much more powerful than we might realize. Quite simply, our happiness and quality of experience depends entirely on our psychological approach to them. It’s why competitive/political people will always view everyone around them as potential adversaries and why the doubtful skeptic invites distrust. When we were young, the world takes a role in creating us, but as we enter adulthood we create the world around us (i.e. our version of reality). It also explains why things that are out of sight are also out of mind; we can’t acknowledge what we can’t or refuse to see. A limited perspective is bound to be one that carries limited information just as any assumption or hastily formed judgement denies the possibility for empathy or truth. Agency demands awareness and attention just as it demands order and authenticity; it’s an expression of discipline and the will to prioritize. It says to us that must we end complacency and get a move on towards actual creative living.

“Those who do not move do not notice their chains”. — Rosa Luxumberg

Adjustments

Study of Ballet Dancers by Edgar Degas, an artist who sought hard to really understand his subjects before he’d make final works of art of them.

“To paint a still life, a painter and an apple must confront and adjust to each other.” ― Albert Camus

As fall approaches, and the summer ending, we witness all around us subtle changes; the weather, the temperature, the look and feel of the sky, even our individual human temperments change. It reminds me of last fall, as I sat quietly during a meditation session I caught notice of a small leaf swimming in the wind towards me, one that had escaped from one of a plethora of Japanese Maple trees that occupy my garden. It played in the air, dancing and making wonderful patterns, paths of action that would both fool and astonish the most astute of animation designers or dance choreographers. Slowly, it would give way to gravity, transitioning its position from one of a series of twirling motions to that of a sideways pendulum akin to the swinging weight of a grandfather clock knocking against the edges of the air, hanging at one side then swooping to the other, repeating itself until eventually descending towards a landing on the pebbled floor. I had not thought of the ground until that moment, not until the red leafy edges had caressed its cold stony surface, giving it both existence and meaning, one idea dying another being born.

In art, as in nature, adjustments are made continually; our art is always moving from place to place, changing its course, transforming from one form into another, till it reaches its final destination. This is the beauty of creation, an entirely unpredictable yet wondrous journey from beginning to end.

Norman Rockwell at work. The commitment of a great artist is always evident, from beginning to end.

Often times, in our adventures as artists or craftsmen, we become too anxious about reaching the end. The goal of an end product, especially one to be completed at a predestined end date or time, creates a seemingly ever-present and unavoidable conflict within our minds. We lament the constant efforts necessary to make our work better. It is already an arduous task to do all the planning at the beginning just so we can begin. And after we’ve started, falling into frustration by the requirements, either externally imposed or internally driven by our own unique vision, to change things. Even near the end, the impatient rush to polish and clean up all the mistakes we’ve made along the way can be significantly taxing. It sure seems like a lot of trouble just to make things right! But that is the process and nature of making art — constant adjustment.

So there really isn’t any justifiable rationale to get all anxious or upset about it. All great craftsmen have an element of perfectionism or “quality obsessiveness” about them; it makes them good artists. And I’m not condoning excessive competiveness or workaholism; holding oneself to higher standards doesn’t necessarily mean being selfishly “success driven” or having Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Balance is important and in fact necessary. But good work takes the time and love of honest attention, not unlike a quiet meditation session. We must give in and submit ourselves to the happenings of the universe. And in the case of the artist, a submission to the necessary actions to make one’s work as good as possible is part of being a true and dedicated artist. Some might refer to this as simply pride and/or professionalism but I believe there is both great meaning and beauty in such a submission. Furtheremore, the foregoing of selfish desire in the work process allows us to use all our available energy for the task at hand, thereby enhancing the probabilities of success and heightens efficiency rather than hindering it. We only have to think back to any incident where we’ve rushed to get something done to be reminded how futile and ineffective such an approach was. So don’t lament changes, or the time and effort needed to fix things. Making adjustments makes your work better AND makes you better.

Living in the now is, and has always been, an “all-in” activity. So love doing the work you’re doing because, being an artist, you should already be doing what you love.

“To create today means to create dangerously.”

― Albert Camus